Turning Over Leaves

Four years ago a leaf started to develop in my life.  Today that leaf needs to be turned over.  Today instead of driving to the dog park I walked.  As I was walking the phrase "turning over a new leaf" came into my head.  Why is it a new leaf?  My leaf is four years old and needs to be turned over.

The next concept that developed was what kind of leaf is it?

 There are stinging leaves that leave you in a little pain and with bumps and then the effects go away. This could apply. Which means after the stinging and bumps went away I would forget about turning it over.

There are leaves that have thorns and when you grab it to turn it over you get poked with the thorn and drop it.

There are leaves, as my grandson Peter found on Sunday,  that are very soft and feel good and you just want to keep on feeling that softness. Why would anyone want to turn over that leaf?

Then I thought about the kind of leaves that are keepsakes, like four leaf clovers, I used to put them in a book to dry them for keeps.

I also saw dead leaves on my walk.  They would probably crumble into pieces but they would make good mulch for the tree they came from.

My leaf is still stinging, still has thorns, is still soft , is still one I have put away between the pages of a book and will always be good mulch for the tree that it came from.

It was about four years ago that I gave up walking four miles a day to be with Ian.  My family, siblings, children, nieces and nephews, and friends all stood beside him as he fought the battle.  It is the most difficult death I have ever experienced.  He just came up in conversation on Sunday night at our family gathering and it was Peter's friend Virgil who brought him up.  He meant a great deal to a lot of people and though he had a lot of problems in his life he still had a huge affect on the people he came in contact with.

I have gained a considerable amount of weight  because I stopped walking.  I am to the point where I need to pick up the edge of that leaf to get it turned over.